Saturday, May 8, 2010

On The Lighter Side

In a flood, blinkers probably won’t be of much help, but while the earth is still dry and we are driving cars instead of floating around at God’s will, they are not only helpful, but also required.  Those of you who are too self-centered to use them, will not gain access to my vehicle when the flood hits, and if God is as fed up with the @^$#* down here as I am, that might just happen sooner than you think.

So today, I am waiting to enter a rotary (or round-about for those of you in other parts of the country) and I sit there while three different cars exit to my left without ever putting on their signal.  But hey, I had all day and I like playing the equivalent of a vehicular Russian Roulette while I try and guess which cars are going to exit, which might let me on, and which will plow right into my side if I dare to pull out.
I also particularly enjoy being the second car in the left hand lane at a red light when the person in front of me intends to go left but doesn’t want to let me, or the oncoming traffic, in on that little secret. It is always really relaxing to be stuck behind him as 20 cars pass on my right and I get to sit through a second red light.  This is even more fun when I am trying to get to my son’s school in time to get him before the late dismissal fee kicks in.
It is also fun to be driving down the highway at 70 miles an hour having traffic dart in front of you without using those pesky little directionals. The only thing worse is to be driving down a one-lane road going 10 miles an hour behind someone who has figured out how to use them, but has NOT figured out how to turn them off.
Inconsiderate drivers drive me nuts.  Since when did blinkers become optional?  Why is it so darn hard to push the little lever up or down and let the rest of us know where you and your 4000-pound vehicle are going to go next?  I have actually been known to flag down the driver in front of me and very innocently tell him “you may want to get your car checked out, it doesn’t look like your blinker is working.”  In less agreeable moods, I have been known to stop the occasional luxury car and say “wow, for that kind of money you’d think the directionals would work.  I usually feel a little better after that.


  1. I seem to remember asking a friend of mine this same question of when did people stop using directionals, and she told me her older brother said they are optional...

  2. Apparently some people agree with your friend's brother. I was very annoyed to find out my husband is one of them. That is two strikes against him.